Monday, 28 February 2011

What's the plan? Reducing your emotional wobbles

We all have wobbles!

These 'wobbles' are dark moments where we say to ourselves 'what the hell am i doing?'

During these times, we berate ourselves, we wonder what on earth we were thinking, we hate everything, there is no light and we have trouble seeing anything positive through the thick blanket of negativity.

This is why it is so important to write down your plans and your aims. It gives you something to fall back on when the chips are down. When you're mid-wobble you can get out your written list and remember what you are working towards and why you are going through all this pain.

Life has pain! The more ambitious you are as a person, the more you want to achieve and grow - the more growing pains you will have! Working on a strategy to lessen the impact of this pain and keep you moving forward despite your wobbles - is a smart move that will only take 5 minutes to implement. It's a quick win!

Once you made a big decision - write down your 'reasons why'. This will help counteract any guilt and regret that may show up later. In a lonesome evening with no one around but a bottle chardonnay for company, looking back at '10 reasons why i go divorced' adds a firm grounding to tipsy, lonely melancholy. During every property development job, i fall back on my 'why i bought this house' list. When undertaking a property development, this list is as important as a wallpaper stripper and a screwdriver - because developing a property is seldom wobble-free and i need a tool to keep me firmly on track!

I first learned the power of a written record when i first emigrated in my late 20s. Despite emigration being something that i had *always* wanted to do, I found the whole experience incredibly hard and some days i was just ready to get on the next flight home. One day, i wrote a list of all the reasons i had emigrated (there were about 15), i kept this on my bedside table until the day i left. That scrappy yellowing piece of paper with mug stains and curling corners, documented all my reasons to leaving and kept me on track through some very hard 'wobbles.' I think that it was so effective because it had: experience reasons, material reasons, relationship reasons, spiritual reasons, cultural reasons, etc. My pragmatic list-making mind could pre-empt and counteract whatever flavor of wobble i was having at any particular time!

Whatever you are going through - i wholly recommend that you write down either the plan or your reasons for your big choice! It will save you a wobble or 2!